4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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