is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
the liver wants what the liver wants
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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