we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
