It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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