He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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