i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
