PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
