You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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