He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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