He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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