It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
