My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
