You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize