she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
