You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
her vagine was all disorganized.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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