They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
