He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
