Moan for me like Helen Keller
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize