So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
