There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
