did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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