We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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