I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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