what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Randomize
