i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
