these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Randomize
