Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
