Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
