It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
