ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
