you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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