i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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