Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
organizing the empties. That sober.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
