Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
