you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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