Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
