I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
