you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
