Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
