3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
