would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
