we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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