Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize