when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
