We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I just found puke in my bra..
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
