dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
