Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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