and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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