Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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