Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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