I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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