just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
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