Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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